The most accurate determination ever!!!
Who really would win the matches between the greatest of all times?
Dory has gathered all of the
information he is able to garner from his personal memory of these great
wrestlers and
all that we have been able to
obtain. We have meticulously fed it into Dyno, our new 20 gigabyte computer.
Dyno
has processed this information
and given us the winner of each match.
Round 4
Match 1
Ed Strangler Lewis
The Rock
The New Kiel Arena, St. Louis - The Rock tells Ed
Strangler Lewis to get his "Candy Ass" in the ring. The Rock lays the "Smack
Down" with a boot to the gut and slams Lewis into the corner and unleashes
a barrage of super kicks and punches. The Rock slams Ed Lewis in the middle
of the ring and signals the Corporate Elbow at which time Lewis grabs the
Rock's leg and jerks him to the ground. Lewis gets on top of The Rock and
applies the Head Lock. Fifteen minutes later, The Rock submits, time 23
minutes.
Match 2
Karl Gotch
Terry Funk
Fair Park Coliseum, Lubbock Texas - Terry attacks
Karl Gotch at the bell and takes him to the floor. They fight to the back
of ringside where Terry hits Karl Gotch in the head with a chair and drags
him into the concession stand. Terry breaks a jug of mustard over his head.
(Mustard covers Gotch and Terry can be heard calling him a yellow coward)
They fight back to the ring where Terry dances and jabs at Gotch who can't
see because his face is covered in mustard, then Terry knocks him out for
the three count with a haymaker to the chin. (Time 18 minutes)
Match 3
Bruiser Brody
Danny Hodge
Hiram Bithorn Stadium, San Juan Puerto Rico - It is
a rainy night in San Juan. In Bithorn Stadium, the fans are covered but
the ring sits at home plate, and it poured. The mat was wet and slippery
rendering Hodge's amateur moves useless on the Hard Core fighting Brody.
Brody takes Danny Hodge to the ground and it is a sloppy mass of mud. Brody
bashes Danny's head into the steel corner post and returns to the ring.
Both men are covered in mud as Brody wails away at a bleeding Hodge. Hodge
gets a front face lock on Brody only to be on the receiving of a suplex
by Brody and a high knee from the corner by Brody for the win in 22 minutes.
Match 4
Dory Funk Sr.
Gene Kiniski
Tucson, Arizona Arena, Rod Fenton promoter - Dory
Funk Sr. was Gene Kiniski's teacher and Gene is at his biggest and strongest.
Funk attempts the spinning toe hold but three times in a row, Kiniski makes
it to the ropes. Kiniski's knee is severely damaged but pain doesn't bother
Big Thunder. Kiniski fights back and tries the back breaker but only hurts
his knee. Funk goes for the the toehold again and catches a boot to the
face sending him over the top rope. Funk returns to the ring through the
ropes but kiniski is on the top rope and comes off with a knee drop to
the back and covers for the fall in 33 minutes.
Match 5
Ric Flair
Johnny Valentine
Sam Houston Coliseum, Houston Texas - Flair takes
a beating as Valentine lays the heavy wood to him while bent backward over
the top ropes. Fifteen minutes elapses as Valentine holds to a front face
lock on Flair. Rick fights back and tries to throw Valentine from corner
to corner. Big John won't budge and throws Flair to the floor. Rick comes
up bleeding and fighting. Now both men are a bloody mess. Flair double-leg
dives Valentine and puts both feet on the second rope to steal the victory.
Flair in 40 minutes.
Match 6
Abdullah the Butcher
Anotnio Inoki
Toronto, Maple Leaf Gardens - Inoki attacks The Butcher
at the bell with repeated punches and chops to the head and blood flies
everywhere. Butcher is down and Inoki tries the Cobra Hold but Butcher
is too compact and strong. Butcher reaches into his boot and pulls out
a stick and cuts Inoki open. Inoki is down and Butcher comes with his big
elbow drop but Inoki moves and gains a submission with the sugar hold.
(20 minutes)
Match 7
Bret Hart
Jim Londos
The Pavilion in Calgary, Alberta - This match matches
Bret's all around style against the leg wrestling of Jim Londos. Londos
has Bret on his face with a top body scissors in the early going. Londos
goes for the half nelson at the 10 minute mark and turns Bret's shoulders
to the mat. Bret is out at the count of almost three and fights back with
fore-arm blows to the head and neck of Londos. Londos goes for a headlock
and Bret back suplexes him followed by the Sharpshooter in 22 minutes.
Match 8
Eddie Graham
Ernie Ladd
Eddie Graham Sports Stadium, Orlando. From the start,
Eddie goes for Ernie's legs. Not is this always where a good wrestler would
attack a big man, but Ernie is a fabulous athlete who left Pro football
to become a wrestler and his knees have suffered many injuries. At the
ten minute mark the Big Cat from Grambling University fights back and catches
Eddie Graham with a big foot to the face, a thumb to the throat, and a
cover but Eddie will not go down. Eddie fights out of the corner and sets
up for the figure four leg lock and Ernie reaches up and rolls Eddie forward
in a cradle position for the pin fall in 22 minutes.
Match 9
Dory Funk Jr.
Carlos Colon
Hiram Bithorn Stadium, San Juan - This is a return
match following their famous tag team match. (Fabulous Moolah vs Dory and
Marti) The match starts with Dory and Carlos going to the floor of Bithorn
Stadium and over to the back stop behind home plate where Carlos bashes
Dory's head into the announcers table. Dory is bleeding and the rabid Puerto
Rican fans are in a near riot stage. Carlos goes for the figure four leg
lock but Dory escapes to the ropes. Carlos goes for a suplex from the apron
into the ring and the Ringside Photographer, Marti Funk trips his leg and
Dory falls on top for the pin fall in 34 minutes.
Match 10
Wahoo McDaniel
Naoya Ogawa
From the beginning, Ogawa does
some nice marshal arts moves and Grecco Roman throws but walks into a hard
chop by Wahoo. The Indian throws Ogawa from piller to post, then throws
Ogawa into the ropes for his finishing move the big chop from the ropes
but Ogawa ducks and throws a side kick to Wahoo's knee. Like Ladd, Wahoo's
knees are weak. Ogawa follows with a spin kick to the head and covers for
the pin-fall in 23 minutes.
Match 11
Ricki Romero
Walter Palmer
Civic Center in Albuquerque,
New Mexico - The fans are heavily in favor of Romero as he throws miniature
sombreros to the fans at the introduction. The bell rings, Romero makes
the sign of the cross and comes across the ring fast surprising Palmer
with his speed. Romero works a headlock for fifteen minutes then sets Palmer
up for his rolling leg lock finish followed with a cannonball drop to the
chest. Palmer kicks out and Romero returns to the head lock. From the head
lock, Palmer is in position for a German suplex followed with his finishing
hold, the spinning toe hold for the win in 25 minutes.
Match 12
Dr. Death Steve Williams
Paul Jones
Norman, Oklahoma University
Field house - Paul Jones starts cautiously as Dr. Death is bigger and stronger
with solid amateur background in football and wrestling. Dr. Death first
advantage with a front chancery and goes for the pin. Jones sets through
with a hammer lock and then three quarter nelson in a pinning attempt.
From here, Jones is the aggressor with a series of forearm blows and punishing
body slams on Dr. Death. Jones covers and Dr. Death kicks out and Jones
makes the fatal mistake of grabbing a head lock. Tiger Driver by Dr. Death
for the pinfall in 15 minutes.
Match 13
Hiro Matsuda
Mr. Wrestling (Tim Woods)
Sportatorium, Tampa Florida. Eddie Graham and Dory
Funk Sr. in attendance. They call it the pit. this is where Matsuda
has destroyed many a wrestler's hopes but this time he is wrestling a University
of Michigan All American. Matsuda attempts a single leg but Mr. Wrestling
blocks and has Matsuda face down on the mat. The first ten minutes belong
to Tim Woods and Funk and Graham comment on the great wrestling skills
of Mr. Wrestling. At the twelve minute mark Matsuda's superior conditioning
begins to show. Woods tries a Grecco hip lock and Matsuda blocks with an
abdominal stretch and falls back into a Guillotine hold for the submission
in 18 minutes.
Match 14
Dan "The Beast" Severn
Kerry von Erich
Reunion Arena, Dallas Texas
- These two great athletes battle for ten minutes before Severn finally
gets a double leg take down but fails to turn Kerry to his back for a pinning
situation. Both men fight to the ropes where the referee pushes Severn
back and as he comes around, Kerry catches him with a forearm to the chin,
stunning Severn. Severn staggers to his feet and Kerry spins like a top
and catches him with the Discus Punch. Severn is out and Kerry covers for
the pin in 22 minutes.
Match 15
David von Erich
Bill Goldberg
Omni in Atlanta - Goldberg gets blinded by standing
in the middle of the ramp as he gets doused by all the sparklers as the
pyrotechnics fire. Von Erich capitalizes be scoring a reverse cradle at
the start of the match.
Match 16
(Hot Stuff) Eddie Gilbert
Sputnik Monroe
Mid-South Coliseum, Memphis - Gilbert is winning when
he makes the horrible mistake of doing the Sputnik strut and referring
to it as the Fargo strut. Monroe goes nuts and shows Gilbert who
invented the strut in addition to a few tricks he picked up wrestling Danny
Hodge. Sputnik wins in 18 minutes with Oklahoma Cross Body Pin.
Match 17
Jose Lothario
Mitsuharu Misawa
Sam Houston Coliseum - Lothario
wears the West Texas State jacket he took from Dory Funk Jr. to ringside.
Lothario, always with the proverbial punchers chance, scores a solid shot
that has Misawa reeling. At that moment, Dory comes to ringside to try
and receive the jacket. A distracted Lothario goes to the floor to
fight Dory and gets counted out.
Match 18
Otis Klingman
Kevin Nash
The Dome in Atlanta - The bell ring but Nash starts
the match by taking the house mike and starting a monologue. Klingman capitalizes
with double leg takedown and slaps on the Klingman toe hold for the win.
Match 19
Iron Mike Dibiase
Owen Hart
The Great Arena in the Sky - Great back and forth
match. DiBiase has the upper hand with power, but Owen counters with quickness
and great technical ability. After 40 minutes, Owen hits the enzugiri for
the win. Owen helps Dibasi to his feet and shakes his hand at the finish.
Match 20
Rob van Dam
Tito Santana
ECW Arena in Philly - Santana misses a flying forearm
and Van Dam hits the split leg moonsault for the win.
Match 21
Brian Pillman
(Bye)